Stillness– Finding Your Spark

I heard a thousand blended notes,

While in a grove I sate reclined,

In that sweet mood when pleasant thoughts

Bring sad thoughts to the mind.

To her fair works did Nature link

The human soul that through me ran;

And much it grieved my heart to think

What man has made of man.

Through primrose tufts, in that green bower,

The periwinkle trailed its wreaths;

And ’tis my faith that every flower

Enjoys the air it breathes.

The birds around me hopped and played,

Their thoughts I cannot measure:—

But the least motion which they made

It seemed a thrill of pleasure.

The budding twigs spread out their fan,

To catch the breezy air;

And I must think, do all I can,

That there was pleasure there.

If this belief from heaven be sent,

If such be Nature’s holy plan,

Have I not reason to lament

What man has made of man?

Wordsworth – Lines Written in Early Spring

30 minutes post sunset; Sitting in a hammock after philosophizing to my boyfriend.

For the past 40 days I have attempted to slow down. I deleted social media, and I tried to take life one day at a time. Let’s just say I failed miserably at slowing down. In fact, without distractions from my phone, I fell deeper into work and classes. I let my life consume me, leaving me no time to be still– to be creative – to express– to reflect. 

This post is more of a motivational pep talk I have made for myself, and potentially you– my friend. Maybe this will be a message for you too. 

Don’t let life consume you. Be creative. I have felt the fear of losing my spark. I have lately wondered if I have lost my creativity all together. If there are no more “juices” to expel. It wasn’t until my morning class that I found my love and passion again. We do stillness and free writing time at the beginning of each class. Last week I went away writing something I was proud of. I realized it reflected not only my inner self, but it was a beautiful story… and I was proud. Proud of myself, of my hands for typing, my mind for composing. I thought I would share it with you all, sort of as an ode to stillness. Without the 5 minutes we have each class, I don’t think I could have found myself in my work again. 

Here is the piece:

My two cats purred a low hum into my ears. The couch seemed to have swallowed me whole. It had been 11 hours since I left the comfort of the cushions. I am 21 today, and I can’t manage to get off this couch. I let my mind wander and think about if I were to stay between the cracks of the couch forever. I could die comfortably at least. Maybe even drift off into a sleep, dream about dancing on clouds with Cumulus and Cirrus, and all the cloud children. Maybe they would even host a party high above the skyline, where the sun was always shining. I would blush and thank them with gratitude, nervously kicking my heels into the plush ground. They would tell me not to be so modest and then we would eat rain from the sky.